


The Past Doesn't Define Me Anymore

by stxr_ships



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, CGRE - Caregiver/Age Regressor, Caregiver!Merle, Long, Non-Sexual Age Play, One shot?, POV Taako (The Adventure Zone), Post-Glamour Springs (The Adventure Zone), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Regressing!Taako, Taako Has a Mental Breakdown (The Adventure Zone), caregiver!magnus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 04:55:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29147811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stxr_ships/pseuds/stxr_ships
Summary: Taako has been awfully stressed out lately now that he’s gotten back into cooking again. Luckily, Magnus and Merle are there to help him when a dish gone wrong results in a panic attack that quickly turns into a situation they didn’t think they would ever encounter with Taako of all people especially considering just how new this is to them.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	The Past Doesn't Define Me Anymore

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I've wrote a fic of this nature and for this fandom so please go easy on me, feel free to leave comments and criticisms in the comments! Finally finished this oneshot, I was inspired by mcschnuggles who also writes content like this, please enjoy the full version!

It had been a particularly off day for Taako today but it was a day like no other after all. For today, he would cook something in the small kitchen that surprisingly enough wasn’t used for cooking in. He decided to go for strawberry tarts, figuring the small puff pastries would be a good start for easing his way back into cooking as he knew Merle was spending time with Lucretia today, and Magnus was supposedly training with Carey and Killian for a few hours.

He may have his own business but gods was he out of practice with pastries and yes, he knew that the whole incident in Glamour Springs was due to Sazed trying to sabotage him by putting arsenic in the food but the fact that it had still been his cooking, the thirty garlic clove chicken that he had made terrified him. He measured out the ingredients carefully, meticulously cleaning the kitchen and taking every possible precaution the high elf could manage.

He was glad he planned to make this on a day that he was most certainly sure his loved ones wouldn’t be near and he wouldn’t run the risk of them eating one of his puffs and they died of food poisoning or they choked on it or- No, he wouldn’t allow himself to worry about that. They were all safe, especially Lup, Magnus and Merle. He carefully made the pastries and pulled them out of the oven once they were done, going to read in the living room while he left them to cool on the counter in the kitchen.

What he didn’t realize was that in that short period of time Magnus and Merle walked into the kitchen and saw the extremely well made puff pastries, looking at each other before each taking a pastry. Taako wasn’t aware they got back until he heard Merle remark “These look pretty damn good, Taako really out did himself with these little suckers eh Magnus?” which sent the poor high elf running into the kitchen pale faced and quickly snatched both the tray of pastries and the pastries from the boys hands and back onto the tray while Taako looked visibly distressed at this. 

“First off, these little beauties ain’t fucking ready yet, second of all you can’t have any of these, you just can’t…!” Taako half yelled in an attempt to mask his concern and worry at the idea of his food being eaten by his loved ones and something going wrong. Merle and Magnus looked at each other concerned for their friend before they looked back at the panicked high elf. Taako laughed nervously before he said “I’m gonna taste test one of these real quick capiche? Need to make sure they aren’t shitty before I go letting people eat these and saying that I’m not as good as I was before I stopped doing my show or that I lost my touch, gotta keep my reputation my dudes!” then picked one up off the tray and prayed to whatever gods that were out there that he didn’t accidentally fill these puff pastries with holly berries while he was transmuting an ingredient as he picked it up and took a bite but didn’t notice anything off as he wordlessly finished the pastry in a couple more bites.

He glared at the calendar that hung in the kitchen with Magnus’s slightly sloppy handwriting, which detailed that today was the day they would show a rerun of the fateful episode of Sizzle It Up With Taako on fantasy tv where he made the thirty garlic clove chicken, that had at first ruined his cooking career for as long as the high elf would’ve lived to be.

“Yo quick question Magnus, why in the gods did you mark the day a rerun of my show was coming on? You know I would’ve shown you cool cats if you asked, at least if it was any other episode than  _ that _ one. That was one episode I’ll um…’never forget’ to say the least, I don’t know if I’ll ever end up making that particular dish again, not after that turned out. I mean sure it was that asshole assistant of mine Sazed’s fault and not mine but if I had just checked the samples first or taste tested it first then maybe I could’ve stopped everyone from eating the samples or let them know it was poisonous or-!” Taako had been cut off during his frantic rambling and looked up to see Merle had laid a hand on his shoulder, and Magnus had gently taken Taako’s hands and pulled them away by the wrists from his longish blonde locks that went down to the middle of his back currently as his human friend held his small light blue hands in his own larger hands.

“It’s okay Taako it’s okay, calm down. We’re here for you. We know you didn’t mean for all those people to die and like you said, it was that Sazed guy who did it, not you. Plus he turned himself in, he’s in prison now remember? Everything’s gonna be alright, you want a hug from me buddy?” Magnus said softly to reassure his friend as he held his arms open for him after he let go of Taako’s wrists, distressed at the sight of his friend so upset with himself after all these years over something that turned out to not even be his fault. 

Merle looked up at the two and nodded. “Like Magnus said, it wasn’t your fault bud. Trust me when I say that me and Magnus would both like a chance to kick that sorry prick Sazed’s behind if he wasn’t already in prison. Now I need ya to take a deep breath alright, you’re hyperventilatin’ a little bit there and I don’t want you to go passin’ out on us now ya hear? Taako? You listenin’ bud?” Merle asked insistently as Taako stared straight ahead with unfocused eyes and his ears rang as he stood there before he shoved Magnus and Merle away from him in a panic.

Merle fell on his ass while Magnus simply stumbled back since he was surprised by the sudden move from Taako and felt bad after Taako sat the tray down on the counter and bolted out of the kitchen and off into his room. The telltale sound of the lock clicking shut the boys heard warned them that Taako wanted to be left alone at the moment. 

Magnus and Merle took one look at each other before deciding to make a trip to Fantasy Costco so they could work together to put a care package for their elf friend together, and planned to make Lup aware of the situation and ask her to come visit with a care package for her twin as well. 

Meanwhile Taako in his room reached under his bed and pulled out a box decorated with holographic and or glittery stickers all over it, then carefully dug out the key for the lock the box had on it from his bedside drawer and unlocked it with shaky hands then sighed as he saw that everything was just as he had put it back into the box as last time.

He contemplated calling Lup on his Stone of Farspeech since he had her frequency to talk whenever they wished but quickly decided against it so as not to bother her or Barry when they were out collecting souls for the Raven Queen. He pulled out the purple chew necklace from the box and put it around his neck then quickly dug out a small beat up box of crayons he pocketed when he was hanging out with Angus once and the boy detective had insisted on Taako ‘drawing his feelings’.

Finally he dug out a loose long sleeve shirt and sweatpants with a worn out ‘Bureau of Benevolence’ logo on them in navy blue and gray which he never really wore ever outside of this room since he refused to be caught dead wearing something so unfashionable as he would put it. He took a deep breath and sat on the floor after he was comfy and then let himself get lost in his coloring.

When Merle and Magnus got back a few hours later with a care package they had worked together on for their friend, they didn’t expect to find Taako’s bedroom door slightly ajar or to hear Taako who quietly hummed happily in his room. Merle picked up the newspaper and sat on the couch in the living room to read while Magnus set the Fantasy Costco bags down on the kitchen counter as he made his way over to the door and slowly poked his head into the room. 

“Taako? You alright in here buddy? We got you some stu-” Magnus asked but cut himself off when he saw Taako happily drawing on some paper, laid on his stomach while he kicked his feet and had what looked to be a sucker in his mouth. Taako looked up and his eyes seemed to light up happily as he quickly got up and made his way to Magnus before latching onto him to give him a hug. 

“Hi Maggie! Wanna see what I been coloring today? Want you to see it!” Taako happily chattered at his friend, and gave him puppy eyes as he tugged on his sleeve. Magnus knew he had to go about this carefully so he didn’t upset Taako and asked “You ok Taako? You didn’t put some kind of potion in your tarts or get some kind of spell cast on you, right?” Taako looked confused and shook his head before he tugged on Magnus’s sleeve again.

“Can I show you the drawings I made and then can we color together? Please please please Maggie?” Taako pleaded before Magnus looked him in the eyes and asked him “How are you feeling right now? I know earlier you weren’t feeling the best so I figured I’d check in on you.” Magnus had a suspicion of what was going on but didn’t want to assume anything or overstep any boundaries.

“I feel little Maggie, like I wanna color and play lots! Know you didn’t mean to make me sad, Sazed was a big meanie. Sorry for shoving you and Emmie...and for pulling out a bit of my hair…” Taako teared up as he apologized to Magnus since he felt guilty that he shoved his friends earlier and that he pulled out a bit of his hair by accident. He clung to Magnus with his face buried in his friend’s shirt as the tears streamed down his face.

Taako genuinely felt bad for being a jerk at times as he thought back to when he told Kravitz that he worked here at the Bureau because he was worried that would no one else would have him, thinking that was also true about the very people he surrounded himself with on the daily and how he acted slightly distant around his loved ones so he wouldn’t get too attached which hadn’t been working the greatest so far.

Magnus hugged him back and carefully guided Taako over to his bed which was surprisingly still made then sat down carefully with his friend in his arms and rubbed his back, as he realized his suspicions from earlier were correct. “It’s okay buddy, you can color or play all you want. I knew Sazed was mean to you but if I had known you were this upset about this I wouldn’t have done that, I just wanted to watch your show since you know I love trying to figure out how you cook so great. I realized we were overcrowding you a bit too so my bad on behalf of me and Merle. As far as pulling out some of your hair, if you let me get some scissors I can trim it so you can’t see it or even cut it shorter if you want. Anyways, how little are you feeling? Four or five maybe? I can run back to Fantasy Costco for some coloring books and stuffed animals if you want buddy.”

Magnus ran his hands through Taako’s hair and figured not much would have to be trimmed off to even it out and hoped that Lup would get back to him since she didn’t answer at first when he called her earlier. Taako took a minute to process what Magnus said and nodded, holding up five fingers to his friend after he wiped away his tears. “Coloring books and a stuffie sounds nice, thank you Maggie!”

Magnus smiled at Taako and held him, surprised by how much of a sweetheart five year old Taako was before he eventually let go of him “I’m gonna go now okay? Merle’s in the living room if you need anything. He’s accepting of age regressors so don’t worry about that, just tell him how old you are and how he can help. If you want any of it we both got you some sweets that you can have, just don’t get a sugar high or eat so much that you don’t eat dinner okay? I don’t think poor Merle would be able to keep up with a hyper Taako.” Magnus chuckled at the thought of a hyper five year old Taako but internally, the thought scared him just a little.

Taako nodded then picked up a ratty and old looking green dragon plush off his bed. Magnus made a mental note to ask Lucretia or Lup if they could try to restore it to be like new and not look as if it were about to fall apart at any moment when Taako was busy and hopefully wouldn’t miss it too much. Taako made grabby hands for Magnus and the fighter obliged him as he picked up his friend to bring him into the living room. Magnus set him down on the couch and pulled Merle aside as soon as Taako was preoccupied with his plushie. 

“I know this is a surprise for the both of us but Taako is an age regressor, I think when we left earlier after he got upset about the whole Sazed thing he ended up regressing. He said he was about five but I don’t know if he’ll regress to be any younger or older just yet. I’m gonna run back to Fantasy Costco and grab him a bunch of stuff I think he’ll love, if something important happens or Lup gives you a call update me asap ok? I shouldn’t be gone long, I also told him he could have some of the sweets we got him but don’t be too hard on him. I think grown-up Taako would understand if he was being a bit of a brat but five year old Taako might cry and you saw him earlier pulling at his hair, I don’t want a repeat of that.”

Merle nodded as he looked over at Taako, realizing he had never really seen the high elf smile as much as he did now or seem so at peace instead of nervous glances and shaky hands running through his blonde locks to calm himself like he had seen before until Taako would realize someone had seen him do it and attempt to play it off.

“I get ya Magnus, besides he seems very happy now. We’ve seen him excited and happy before but he doesn’t seem as nervous or paranoid of his surroundings like he can usually tend to be. You think he’s ever had a caregiver, or that this has been goin’ on for a while and we just didn’t notice it since he prefers his space when we’re not adventuring or have to be in close proximity? I mean I know he talks to Lup but...I feel like he didn’t even tell her about this, we both know that he prefers to keep to himself and has a hard time asking for help with more personal problems. Anyways you might wanna go now before Fantasy Costco closes for the night.” Merle warned to the fighter.

Magnus nodded and made his way out of the dorm, waving back with a grin when Taako shyly waved at him when he noticed Magnus leaving. Taako looked at Merle nervously when the door closed and clung to his plush with one hand while he fiddled with the Stone of Farspeech in his other hand as he attempted to contact Lup with it but struggled to understand how it worked. Taako stuck it in his pocket because he thought Merle would be upset or take it from him. Merle instead sat down next to Taako and carefully took the stone out, getting the frequency as soft bells played to show that it was trying to get the stone with that frequency to allow access. After a couple moments Lup could be heard through the stone and Merle handed it to Taako.

“Taako! Hey, what’s up? You wanna talk for a bit? Barry’s still off collecting souls right now but at the moment I don’t have anything to do so I was a little bored until you called little bro!” Lup happily stated to her twin. Taako’s eyes lit up and he started happily chatting with her until she got some new souls to collect then bid him goodbye for now and that she’d try to swing by later with a ‘goodie bag’ as she had put it. Merle and Taako had some of the ice cream he had gotten from the boys, playing a kids board game together until Magnus got back. Merle guiltily remembered that he was supposed to let Magnus know if Lup planned to come over and got embarrassed before he pulled him aside to tell him. Magnus was fine with it and showed Merle the variety of coloring books, stuffed animals and puzzles he had gotten for Taako.

“I’m hoping this will all make him happy, I tried to remember anything I had seen him eyeing when we’ve gone to Fantasy Costco in the past and I kinda accidentally spent all my gold on everything for him…” Magnus rubbed the back of his head and smiled nervously, embarrassed he may have gone a bit overboard but figuring there had to be at least some stuff Taako would like. He also wanted to spoil him since five year old Taako was a sweetheart in his eyes and had won the fighter over easily. Merle shook his head and smiled at how obviously Magnus had come to like five year old Taako. Magnus cheerfully called Taako into the living room and carefully set the bags on the table. 

“Taako? C’mere bud, I’ve got some stuff for you I think you’ll like!” Taako heard this and curiously poked his head out from the doorway of his room, cautiously making his way into the living room. He stopped in front of the coffee table, digging through the bags one by one after Magnus nodded to him letting Taako know it was ok to look through everything. Taako dug through the bags with glee and got excited at the coloring books and puzzles with 500 pieces in the bags along with the crayons. He looked through the other bags that were left, seeming pleased as he pulled out comfy clothes and got very giddy when he saw a small black and white spotted bunny plush dressed as a wizard. He hugged Magnus tightly then jumped up and down happily. “Thank you Maggie!” Magnus felt his heart melt a little at the sight of his friend so happy.

“You’re very welcome Taako, glad you like everything. I heard from Merle that you talked to Lup and she said she’d come by later with stuff for you too. Now you have plenty of new things to play with and clothes to wear when you’re in your headspace. Do you wanna color in one of your new coloring books with me?” Taako nodded as he picked up a couple coloring books and the box of crayons. He struggled to hold everything as he practically bounced up and down in place before he followed Magnus into his currently messy bedroom. A few minutes later, he came out with another coloring book and ran over to Merle then tugged on his hand so he would color with them as well.

A few hours later it had been getting close to nighttime and Lup had finally shown up around dinner time thankfully. Taako had been trying to cook in the kitchen and Magnus was stuck with the task of trying to keep Taako from using anything that would involve him using the stove and possibly causing a fire, which had ended in Taako squirming in the fighter’s arms trying to get free and throwing a fit. Lup smiled and shook her head since she knew all too well how stubborn her brother was in his headspace even if he had never directly told her when he regressed.

“Hey Magnus, mind if I take him from ya? He might cooperate if it’s me.” Magnus nodded and passed him over to Lup then watched as she held her brother close and ran her hands through his hair gently. He seemed to stop squirming as much and listened as Lup negotiated with him over the dinner argument until he agreed that they could cook together as long as he was supervised the whole time.

Lup rolled her eyes at Magnus and said “Remember this in case he does this again, as long as someone supervises it seems perfectly fine by me! Anyways, me and Taako are going to make chicken tenders now so seeya in an hour!” With that Magnus was rushed out of the kitchen before he could get a single word in.

A bit later everyone ate dinner and afterwards he, Magnus and Lup worked on a puzzle featuring different adventures and fantasy creatures. Taako got excited as they finished the puzzle and immediately pointed out both the fighter and lich featured on the puzzle. “Look Maggie, look Lulu! There’s you Maggie,” He pointed to the fighter, “And there’s you Lulu!” He then pointed to the lich and hugged Lup tightly while Lup teared up as she thought about how much she had missed spending time with her twin and him calling her ‘Lulu’. They got him ready for bed with no problems and Lup headed off home after she had thanked Magnus and Merle that they allowed her to visit on such short notice. 

The next morning Taako hesitantly made a beeline for the coffee since he wasn’t regressed anymore and figured since it was 7AM and that no normal person would be up this early since the strawberry tarts from yesterday didn’t appear to be poisonous he’d eat some of them and then immediately head to bed. What he forgot however was that Magnus got up at 7AM to go exercise around the base and got caught with a couple strawberry tarts on a plate and some coffee while he tried to hide a guilty expression. 

Magnus was unfazed and just said “Don’t worry about yesterday, we’re all here for you and I hope you’re okay Taako. Everyone really does care about you and you’re so loved, I hope you know that. Anyways, I’m going to head out to start my morning routine. Me and Merle will be around to talk to if you ever wanna talk about your problems.” Magnus headed out the door and Taako mouthed a quiet ‘Thank you’ to him before he headed into the living room. 

Taako went to sit on the couch and hesitated when he saw the old and worn dragon plush next to the new bunny plush Magnus had gotten him. He debated internally about putting them away before he decided against it and carefully moved them aside so he could have a place to sit. He sat down as he took a sip of coffee and quietly smiled to himself as he looked at the plushies, thinking just one thing. _Maybe this group of friends and found family he had now wasn’t so bad after all._

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: I can't believe this got over 80 hits and almost ten kudos, thank you all so much! Hopefully I'll be putting out a new work somewhat soon.


End file.
